The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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