I think scott just propositioned me for sex
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I understand Curling. That high.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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