Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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