Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
