i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
