"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Randomize
