you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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