I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
