Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
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