I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
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