i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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