He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
