He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize