Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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