Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
