discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize