There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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