FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
