Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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