Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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