doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
