Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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