butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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