they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize