Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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