Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize