Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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