so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
