He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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