Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Enjoy the penises
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize
