I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
