I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I have post one night stand depression
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