I hate your face
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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