I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
