I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
We are all done wearing pants today
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
