I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
