I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize