so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
