Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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