Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
