I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
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