Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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