Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Are my feet made of real feet?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
