once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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