my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
