Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
