My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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