I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
