But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
