the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
