lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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